A new survey shows most Brits don’t think hard work brings wealth and happiness, writes Tom Hodgkinson

On a rather nauseating podcast called Coffee with the Greats, which interviews absurdly rich American corporate executives, JP Morgan boss Jamie Dimon recently spoke about his morning routine. He says he gets up at 5am, reads about eight newspapers, and has one cup of coffee (no breakfast). Dimon then goes into the office and gets on with earning $34.5 million a year (what on earth do they do with all that money?).

I wish these supposedly great people would just leave us alone with their guilt-inducing “early to bed, early to rise” parables. A couple of years ago a review copy of a book called My Morning Routine arrived in the office and made for very depressing reading indeed. Every single one of the successful people interviewed claimed they got out of bed at 6am or earlier. Typical examples: “I wake up at 5.30am. I drink a cup of water, eat my cereal, get dressed and run out of the door to work.” “I get up between 4am and 6am, usually 5am.”

The implied promise is that if you get up early, you will suddenly find yourself the boss of a gigantic corporation earning tens of millions of dollars every year. Well that’s very obviously not true. The men at the top (they’re generally men) are not there because they get up early, but because they are greedy, ruthless semi-psychopaths with no morals. And there are very, very few of them. They are famous because they are so unusual.

And anyway, early rising does not equate to real greatness. Dr Johnson was a far greater man than Jamie Dimon and he famously lay in bed till noon most days. Florence Nightingale was another renowned bedaholic.

My own morning routine would go something like this. Wake up at around 8am and curse myself for the extra beer I had the night before (or for watching three episodes of an addictive American drama series). Lie in bed for a while and hope that Victoria will bring me a cup of tea. Get my own cup of tea and then go back to bed. Lie propped up by pillows, staring at the wall, trying to wake up. At this point I am reminded of a joke my late friend the journalist Gavin Hills used to make. “I start the day with my morning workout. I try to work out who I am, where I am and what I did last night.” Get out of bed at around 8.45am and sit down for a poached egg and toast at 9am.

And we idlers are increasing in number, if a cheering report in today’s Guardian is to be believed. A new survey says that Britons are “are less likely than people from elsewhere to place importance on work”. The idea that hard work leads to wealth and happiness, long attacked by this journal, seems to be losing its grip. Only 39% of UK respondents believed that “hard work would bring a better life” (that compares to 55% in the US, world leader in both the Protestant work ethic and of deaths through opioids).

The piece added: “[Brits] also increasingly believe that it would be a good thing if less importance were placed on work, a figure that has risen from 26% to 43%. [since 1990]”

Yes, it seems that Brits are waking up to the realisation that the Greek idea of leisure or schole – time devoted to philosophising – is just as, if not more, important than work.

To rephrase Priti Patel, we are the best idlers in the world.

PS We’re looking forward to a new season of “A Drink with the Idler.” We’re kicking off with Guy Standing whose brilliant new book on time argues for more schole all round. Then it’s tech writer Cory Doctorow who wrote this issue’s cover story. Other guests include Georgia Mann, Rupert Sheldrake, Anna Keay and Griff Rhys Jones. Please note: we have changed the system slightly and no longer use Eventbrite. This means you save on booking fees. Idler subscribers, please now register for free at this page. Non-subscribers, get your tickets here. We look forward to seeing you on Zoom on Thursdays at 6pm.

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